I came to Kent's church very jaded by "church" in general. I had experienced things that no one should ever experience from a church or a pastor, so Kent definitely had his work cut out for him - he just didn't know it (or maybe he did..), getting me to trust him was pretty much just out of the question, so I thought. I watched Kent, very closely, much closer than he realized I know. I watched how he responded to people who walked in the doors of his church, how he reacted to friends that I brought, friends who were shunned by the pastor at my previous church, because of their choices in life - I brought them to Kent's church, maybe as a test, I'm not exactly sure, but I watched... I watched him that Sunday morning that they came, as he made a bee-line over to them, greeted them just like he greeted the regulars - with a huge warm smile and a very sincere "welcome!". I was impressed. Time went on and I continued to watch this man who was a pastor, but unlike any pastor I had ever seen. I'll never forget one of his first sermons he preached, he made the statement more than once, "don't make me the phantom pastor, I am not that man. I am not perfect, I fall, I sin, I fail just like you do". That probably does not mean a lot to many people, but coming where I came from, where the pastor had to be put very high on a pedestal and referred to himself as "the man of God" constantly, this statement made by Kent, really impacted me. I decided that day, that this was a man I could follow, this was a man I could trust, this was a man that might be the first pastor (besides my father) that might actually love me! I was so happy to be there, I was so happy to have finally found a "home". Slowly, over the next couple of years, without ever knowing it, Kent literally showed me what it meant to have a pastor, to have a man who did not talk about you behind your back, to have a leader who led many times without ever speaking, to have a pastor that you could bring ANY of your friends to, no matter what their circumstances were, and he would love them unconditionally and never judge them or embarrass them. Kent changed me, for the better. He softened my very hard heart - my heart was never hard towards God, it was hardened towards church leaders, more particularly - pastors.
Time went on, things changed, but one thing always remained - this man was a true Christian. This man never said an ugly word about anyone, that I heard anyway - he just loved. His one and only goal in life was to "make Christ known", by that he did not mean to necessarily tell the world you were a Christian - his idea of making Christ known was more of a lifestyle, it was actually "being Christ" to the needy, to the unlovable, to the ones that no other pastor would want in his church for fear of reputation - or not being the "cool pastor" on the block, with the church congregation that was sleek, well-dressed and "looked the part" of a church, so that other "well-to-do people" would want to be a part of it. Kent did not care about those things, he simply cared if everyone he ever came in contact with, knew that Christ loved them. Period. He showed me a lot during his years as my pastor.
One month ago, on July 9th, his life was suddenly taken from us. Tuesday he was at the church working on his dream of having a community soccer field for the underprivileged kids in our area - Jordan, my oldest son and Nelson, Kent's middle son, were there working with him - Wednesday we got the phone call that he was gone. Doctors ruled it a heart attack - he was so young, only 47 years old - 3 kids (22, 19 & 15), and a wife.... no warning, no build-up.... nothing, just gone. I was instantly sent into a tailspin, the flashbacks were constant - sitting in the ER that day I was in a daze. The church family was coming and going, people were standing up and hugging, crying, mourning the loss of this amazing man - and I just sat there, paralyzed with shock and flashbacks. I re-lived every moment that my own family experienced 14 years ago. Everything was the same, from the age of his precious children, to the demeanor of his sweet wife, to the fact that every person who came sincerely thought that they were his best friend.... exactly the same as it was when we went through this with my dad. I still cry, even as I write this, for his children and wife, for his parents, for his church.... the pain is so deep and hurts so bad for all of them. There I sat, watching it all in disbelief. I wish I could have told Kent what he did for me personally, I wish I could have expressed how deeply rooted the bitterness and pain was, until him. I wish he would have known the depth of the impact he had made on me - not just me, my kids too. When I told my kids about his passing, Cayden burst into tears and said, "but mom, he loved us so much" - I thought, "wow... that was Kent", even my 9 year old thought he was Kent's best friend! I have known 2 men in my life who had the ability to make other people feel so special and so important, but they made people feel that way because they genuinely loved each person, it was not for show, they were real - Kent and my dad are the only two men I have ever known like that... I always told his daughter Kayla, that God had sent me to his church for them, his family/kids... I had no idea when I was telling her that years ago, that it was going to end up this way.. I have grown so attached to these 3 young people over the last 5 years, and love them with every fiber in my body. They are all so sweet, kind and considerate of others. Nelson has been Jordan's best friend for years, and Kayla and Caden have been around, in our home, and in our family, we just considered them part us.
God leads, and we all do our best to follow, back in 2009 I had no idea the impact this man would have on my life when I walked into his little church in Rowlett.... I also had no idea about the impact that his kids would have on my life... I cannot think of any young person, outside of family, that I would literally drop any and everything for - any time, day or night. Is this my subconscious way of "paying if forward" to Kent? I don't think it is, I honestly believe that God developed this love in my heart for them years ago, for this very reason... Kent changed my heart, he changed my perception of a "pastor" to a friend - how could I not pay it forward? How could I not be broken by the events of the last month? And most importantly, how could I not take his family into my heart and hold them for as long as they let me, pray for them every single day, be there for them until they want me gone? I will. I will always love them, I will always do anything in this world for them. They are his legacy, they carry his genes, their children will carry his genes - everyone they touch will, in a sense, be touched by Kent - their lives are the continuation of his life on this earth. Their dreams coming true, will be his dreams coming true.. I know this, because I have been there.
To Kayla, Nelson & Caden, I had no words of wisdom.... when I spoke with Angie, I had no idea what to say - I knew that nothing I could ever say would make what had happened to their life ok. I know what the next few years are going to bring them, I know there will be a lot of good times, and a lot of sad times.... there really are no words I could give... What I do know, is that somehow, God will carry them - through the fog of all that they have been through, I know that He will carry them when they cannot carry themselves. I know that all three of his kids will make him so proud over the next few years - I know that his legacy will live on through them. His dreams for his family will come true - he will always be with them.... so will their church family, and so will we.
Kent, you were a "one of a kind" pastor - and I know just how proud you are of your family, all of them. I saw the light in your eyes every time your only daughter, Kayla would walk into a room, I saw the pride you felt when you watched your middle son, Nelson, as he would selflessly serve others, constantly. I watched you talk about Caden, and the beast of a soccer player he is, oh how you loved watching him play. I know that Angie was your heart and soul, and I watched you love her. You made an impact on thousands and thousands of people in your short 47 years on this earth - I was one of them. Thank you. Your family will be taken care of by all of us, by every life you changed, by every heart you softened, and by every person that you so deeply touched - for now, this is goodbye - give my dad a big hug for me, tell my Kelsey that I cannot wait to hold her and kiss her.... until we meet again....
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